A Pandemic Puppy

It’s summertime during the pandemic, the equivalent to springtime on the farm. New puppies are everywhere. Families smiling, kids frolicking through the fields with their best friend on a sparkling new leash. Social media pictures filled with fluffy fur babies next to their human siblings. Behind the camera? A different scene reveals itself.

Screams. Shredded toilet paper. Accidents. Chewed up toys. More screams. Everyone yelling at everyone else. A confused puppy. Chewed up crown molding. Plants uprooted in the backyard. A husband about to pack his things and hit the road.

A nightmare, right? Why would anyone in their right mind take on such a terror in addition to young kids during a pandemic?

It’s like having a baby. You are in it for the long haul and the (hopefully) wonderful end product. But it’s SO much work up front. If you have done it before, you’ve blacked out all the bad otherwise you wouldn’t have done it again. It’s the true definition of insanity.

I’m here to tell you the truth about getting a new puppy since it seems to be the thing to do at the moment: it is a literal you-know-what show. And you step in it. I literally kicked poop barefoot in my kitchen. You think your house was messy before? Prepare. This dog finds things to shred that I didn’t know could be shredded. No special stuffed animals or lovies are safe—all are sitting ducks just waiting for their moment to be attacked and then paraded around while everyone manically chases after. It’s like a loud, frantic game of follow the leader where everyone is crying. Just beautiful. Oh, and it’s only 8:03 a.m.

Nighttime falls, and your pup is so exhausted from driving you crazy all day he wraps himself into a ball and sleeps with the face of an angel. You look at him and wonder how on earth you got so upset with him—he’s just a precious, innocent baby. Your husband complains about him and you defend that puppy with your life: “That is my SON you are talking about! How dare you!!!”

People who are kidless often equate their furry children to human ones, and they aren’t too far off. No one would do this if they knew what was coming. I will argue that being able to crate your puppy in times of stress is an advantage over “real” children, but both have their struggles. We all go into it knowing we are in it for the long haul—a dog for our kids to grow up with, a true member of our family. Those pictures to look back on years down the road when your sweet, crazy puppy enters his golden years and then leaves an irreplaceable hole in your home and heart.

Puppies are insane, but so are kids and we do it anyway. If you have jumped on the pandemic puppy train, we feel each other’s pain, but we both get the spell these dogs have over us.

Unconditional love is a special thing when you find it. Mine so happens to be the most adorable four legged creature destroying my home one room at a time—and I’m okay with that.

 

Megan Coffey
Hi! I'm Megan, former teacher turned stay-at-home-but-never-home mom to Peyton, 7, and Gage, 4. I host the Kansas City MomCast podcast! I'm married to the most patient person on this earth, Chris, and we live in Overland Park with our kids, an insane lab, and two guinea pigs. You can find me over committing to everything, reading informational and self-help texts, listening to podcasts, organizing, spending time with friends over margaritas, thrifting, and staying up way too late to have peace and serenity. I love people and hearing their stories and look forward to connecting with KCMC readers!

1 COMMENT

  1. Nailed it. You have a close friend that’s going to need your support with her new puppy. So stinkin cute🐾

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