I Broke Up with My OB/GYN

We had been together for more than 15 years. She was the one person who I felt I would never have to worry about replacing. She knew some of the most intimate details of my life. I thought we would live happily ever after. It was what I thought would be the perfect relationship.

She supported me and my husband when we were struggling to get pregnant. When we finally got the positive test, she celebrated with us. She cried with me at my first sonogram when we heard the first sounds of the beating heart. She held my hand as my belly grew and answered all of my first-time mom questions. 

When we decided to add to our family, she listened to my concerns. I was worried that I would have trouble getting pregnant again. Boy, were we surprised when the test came back positive one month later. She saw the panic in my eyes when there was no heartbeat during the first sonogram. She cried with me when she had to tell me I was having a miscarriage. 

We tried again. Nine months after my miscarriage – on what would have been my delivery day – I found out I was pregnant. She did everything she could to keep me pregnant. Weekly sonograms and check ups; she assured me she was doing what was best for me. She helped me deliver my rainbow baby, and I thought for sure we would live happily every after.

Three years later, I found myself in her office crying. I was experiencing painful periods, and I needed help fast. I knew she would be the one person who could help me find relief. She started throwing around words like hysterectomy, laser ablation and other  types of surgical procedures. I did my research, and I knew there had to be other options to start with.

I was scared. I wanted to trust that she had my health in her best interest. I had two options on where I could have surgery. When I chose the option that worked best for me, she told me that she has never performed surgery there, and she would prefer I chose the other location. My insurance was in-network at the hospital I chose, if I went with the second option I would have to pay 80% of the surgery fees out of pocket. I felt betrayed. Why was she so insistent? After all we had been through together, was I was just another number to her? I left her office and never went back.

I decided to get a second opinion. I felt like the universe was telling me not have the surgery with all of the hurdles in the way and that this was my time to find a new doctor. 

I found an physician who specializes in gynecology. Her practice is dedicated to non-pregnancy related issues. She sat with for more than 30 minutes as I summed up my last 15 years of health records! I am sure it wasn’t fun, but she made me feel important, and she didn’t rush me. She agreed that surgery is a last resort and that there are other options for women experiencing symptoms that I am.

We came up with a plan, together. She calmed my fears and gave me hope. I feel like I can trust again.

Here’s to hopefully finding the doctor of my dreams.

Jessica Salazar Collins
Jessica Salazar Collins is a momma of two boys, 11-year-old Joshua Arturo and 5-year-old Trinidad Ramon. Jessica was born and raised in Kansas City, Mo., (she lived in Westport before it was cool) and is the only KU Jayhawk graduate in a family of Mizzou Tigers. She loves all things Frida Kahlo, chocolate and superhero related (boy mom necessity). In her spare time, Jessica likes to search the web for all things about Tangancícuaro, Michoacán (the mother land), low carb recipes and tips on understanding Marvel comics. Jessica is a third generation Latina trying to keep alive her Mexican traditions with her sons.