You all remember career day right? When grown ups in different jobs would come and talk to 
your class so that you could get an idea of what you wanted to do when you grew up? As a young teenager I had no earthly idea what I wanted to be when I “grew up.” As a mid-30s mom, I have no earthly idea if I’m even a grown up now! What I do know, however is that what I wanted to do as a teen, and as a young 20-something are definitely not what I do now nor what I wish I were doing. I love when I meet someone who has a position or career that they are passionate about, especially if it’s one I’ve never heard of.
Women seem to be defined by two things in life during the childbearing years. Our status as parents and our job titles. At almost 20 years out of high school, I can finally answer the question of what I would like to be when I grow up, but sadly my answer would mean a whole new degree and a Masters degree, too — something I have neither the financial nor time resources to complete. So here I am toiling away in a position that brings fulfillment, pays the bills and gives me a bit of flexibility in my hours but doesn’t ignite my passion. How do you reconcile the things you didn’t know when you had the resources with the things you know now but cannot, for one reason or another, act on?
For me the answer to my question was to rethink the resources. It’s true that in this season of my life going back to school to pursue a new career isn’t an option on the table. But I do still have resources around me that would allow me opportunities to think outside the box and use some creative energy that my work doesn’t.
I started at home. I love to read. I believe that literacy education is extremely important, even to very young children. My dream job would definitely revolve around books. So, I committed to teaching my daughter to love books and reading and words and what those things can bring to your life. We also spend a lot of time in the public library which opens up so many doors. We meet new people, discover new books and can spend hours playing at our local branch.
I branched out from there and discovered that another resource was in the back of my home. My kitchen. I’ve always loved to cook and bake, but once my daughter was born and I was back to work full time, my fun and adventurous 8 p.m. weeknight dinners quickly became a never ending loop of nuggets, grilled cheese and pancakes and bacon with the occasional stressful dinner out with a small child thrown in.
I decided that while I’m not interested in committing to a from scratch home cooked meal every night, I am mostly dependable to find a fun recipe to try every week or so. It usually happens on a weekend and it doesn’t always turn out as well as we would like, but it’s so good. I like cranking up my kitchen radio and setting up an old cookbook and just having fun. Sometimes my daughter is my sous chef, but a lot of times my husband is. It is so nice to reconnect with him in the evening while we dig ingredients out of the fridge and attempt to unwrap a whole chicken without completely destroying the entire kitchen.
Lastly, I made myself explore. I am very much a come home from work, put on yoga pants, do the nighttime routine and go to bed type of person. Starting when my daughter was very young, we decided it was important to us that she learn about and love our city as much as her father and I do. To do so I left my comfort zone of yoga pants and Ben and Jerry’s to seek out great places to eat, shop, browse, read and dance in the city. Planning a great adventure day, researching new restaurants, reading about fun festivals and doing the hands on playing to find the best parks in the metroappeals so much to both my love of planning and the excitement of knowing what great fun is in our future.
By rearranging the way I was viewing the resources I had, I was able to figure out ways to satisfy that desire to do things that were more meaningful to me. I’ve found a way to accept that while I may not be doing the important, meaningful work I wish I was all of the time, I’m doing work that is needed and valued, and I’ve added in great ways outside of work to utilize the resources I have now.
