Over the last 13 years of marriage, domains began to form in our home. At some point without even knowing it, there were very clear cut lines for who took care of what. There seemed to be unspoken rules about who was in charge of interior design and who dealt with all things automotive. They were your stereotypical husband and wife jobs.
This isn’t a post to complain about my role in our household or to complain that my husband doesn’t do enough. On the contrary, I love my role of caretaker, decorator and custodian. And there is no one else I’d rather call my other half. But we didn’t realize, that by putting up these roles and getting set in them, we were no longer appreciative of what the other did to help our house feel like a home. We just became expectant.
Not too long ago my husband expressed that due to the upcoming spring there were various landscape touch ups that needed his immediate attention. He informed me that his entire weekend would be spent outside in the yard. As I watched him bring in the truckloads of rock and mulch my eyes were opened for the first time. Not only had he just worked a full week, but he had also helped with baseball practice, hauled a tiny dancer to and from class and still had time for family things in the evenings. He had to be exhausted.
So, I stepped out of my domain and decided to help.
After 30 minutes my arms and back were killing me, and I was nowhere close to putting a dent into what he needed done. As he pulled up with the next truck load I could see the look of shock on his face. (Let’s just say, I’m not known for my outdoorsiness!) He inspected my work and gave me the biggest hug ever, despite my sweat! Throughout the rest of the afternoon he continued to be so appreciative of my help.
Working together in that afternoon sun made us both realize that even though our domain lines had been set long ago that didn’t mean we couldn’t go walk a mile in the other person’s shoes. I began to realize that taking care of the outdoors was more than just “playing outside” or an excuse for him to have alone time. The love and care that he puts into specifically placing each plant, tree or paver stone is the same loving care that I put into planning out our meals or vacuuming.
Ever since that day our lines are little more blurred. Our zones aren’t so black and white. And the appreciation that we feel for one another continues to grow. So if you haven’t ever stepped into his domain I highly suggest it! Watch the way his love shows through the things he does for your family. And ALWAYS say thank you!
