Women: It’s Time To Rise

There is something in the air. The crisp cool wind of change. Are you paying attention? Some may even ask, are you woke?  It is a start, but just as anything that is beginning, there is still a long way to go to find the finish line. 

I’ve noticed it for a year or so now but watching the events of Brett Kavanaugh and Dr. Christine Blasey Ford recently has made it ever more present in my mind. Women are rising. This is not a post of Brett Kavanaugh’s innocence or guilt. It is not a post to point fingers or cast blame.  ou may be team #IBelieveHer or have used #MeToo or maybe even #TimesUp. You may be someone who thinks that there is a witch hunt out for any and all men-hide your husbands, hide your sons! 

However, here is my hope, that we can find harmony within our disagreements and speak openly and honestly. That we can love on each other and care for one another. We will all be better for it.

I am completely aware that the way in which you view the world will depend on the world that you live in, the lens in which you view it. My vantage point will be drastically different from that of my husbands, which will be drastically different from his best friends, and so on. While I could never speak for an entire community of women, bear with me while I try.

While I believe in the power of a woman, I also believe in gender roles. Which means I often find myself playing a game of tennis in my head of feminist versus not. Meaning, I believe my husband is the head of the household and should lead us. But do not misunderstand me, I also think my role is right next to him, being his helpmate. He is not a ruler over me, but my teammate. His equal. I believe a man should hold a door for a woman, get up from his seat so a woman can sit down. Not because a woman is incapable of tasks such as holding doors, but because it is polite. This rising I speak of is not about that, not to me. It is more about a woman’s safety, a woman’s value, a woman’s worth. Which sadly often gets overlooked. Not by all, but in general I think women have felt unseen.  Today we ask that that be changed.

Men: We are not trying to take over. We do not want to push you out of the way and stomp on your face while we climb. Can we share the sunlight, or do I have to sit in your shadow forever?  I know you don’t see it.  I don’t blame you for that, for your lens that you view it.

But I have spent a lifetime of feeling like what I have to say is less important than that of my male coworker.  I have been harassed at clubs (in my youth, not quite so much in my old-er age, let’s be real). I have worried about walking at night to my car, carrying mace, locking my doors as soon as I get in my car, someone slipping something in my drink, entering an elevator only occupied by the opposite sex – I wonder, have you? I have had sexual innuendos thrown at me by several of my former bosses. The list goes on and on. 

And here is the crazy part, some women’s lists are a million times worse than mine.  Life altering, bring you to your knees in prayer, horrid. Memories and events that leave scars and thoughts that will never go away. Something dawned on me recently.  Over the years, I never saw any of these invasions on my personal space, aggressive sexual behavior or gender inequality as wrong. I have just accepted these actions as normal. Either going to a different area of the club so some overly cologned guy would stop grinding his genitals on mine or avoiding an aggressive boss all together.

I accepted it as normal. I accepted that I would have to work twice as hard to be heard and taken seriously. I accepted that someone would make rude comments at me when I am out jogging. I accepted that I will feel uneasy in a dress that, oh mercy me, hits right above my knee cap (scandal!). Being categorized as a bad word if I am assertive, while a man is seen as strong.  And now I look into the eyes of my 14-year-old daughter, and I say NO MORE. It is not OK.

So men, I beg of you, I plead, do not take this personally. Do not see it as a women are taking over everything type of thing.  Instead, cheer us on. Cheer on your mother, your sister, your friend. Lift her up and let her know she is not just beautiful but smart and vivid and what she has to say should never be silenced!

Women: It has been said, with great power comes great responsibility. Let us be sure to use it appropriately. May we never jump on a bandwagon and burn someone to the ground unrightfully so. Speak your truth. Stand your ground. You matter.  Your voice matters. May our daughters never worry about their safety, her voice being heard or the promotion she rightfully deserves.  May they pick a dress based on if they think it’s cute, not the message it may send to someone else. May they know they are just as important as their male counterpart. May they feel powerful. May they feel strong. May they rise!

Louder for those in the back… MAY THEY RISE!